Mercy Home Update

Hey everybody...I know my blogs are few and far between, but I like to think of it as quality vs. quantity. And I am back writing because of people who are very close to my heart.





I am proud to be blogging today about the Mercy Home. Many of you remember, I'm sure, about my time in India working with the Sisters and all of the wonderful students. People world-wide have been hard at work either fundraising or physically constructing and this summer brings the completion of the new, safe building for the women currently living at the Mercy Home. For those willing and able to go, the dedication and grand opening will take place on June 16th in Annaikarai, India.



For those of us who are unable to attend there is still something we can do. The Mercy Home Foundation has pledged not only to build a new facility but to continue to support the Sisters and women through education and training. The physical building will be complete but there is still so much left to be done. With our help each woman will have her own bed - most for the first time in their lives - there will be ceiling fans for the dreadful hot season, screens to keep out the overwhelmingly intense population of mosquitos in the wet season and, most importantly, there will be qualified and trained staff that will help these women reach a level of independence and, consequently, self-esteem never thought possible.



Please help to give these women the chance in life that they deserve - chances that you and I take for granted everyday. Visit the Mercy Home Foundation to see the latest video of the construction and to make a donation - as little as $30 can provide a bed for one of the women. I am back in Rome after my trip abroad - but my heart belongs in India. Please join with me in making a difference!

Me love you long time...

White sand beaches, island paradises, jungles, and ridiculously cheap prices…it is no wonder that tourists flock to Thailand – but that’s not the only draw. While the “lady boy “ jokes never fail when planning a trip, sexual tourism is a very real, very accepted thing within the country.

Although sex-change operations are common in the United States, they are unfortunately far from being accepted by the general public. Not so in Thailand. While I was with Suzanne in Railay we got onto the subject. As it turns out, one of her boyfriend’s classmates from school is now a woman. When she asked him how he felt about it (you know us Americans…all about “feelings”) he just shrugged his shoulders and said “He was a boy, now he’s a girl.” It was like that all over the village – no one gave it a second thought.

Being good travelers and trying to see every “side” of the country we went for a stroll around the red light district in Bangkok – after learning more about lady boys I was interested to see the other side…prostitution. We first went to Cowboy Soi (soi referring to a city block). It was a rather small street lined with go-go bars. The girls working would stand outside in matching outfits (bikinis or short skirts) and beckon the passerby inside. Some even had themes, i.e. the girls working at the bar ‘Skool’ sported schoolgirl outfits reminiscent of the early career of Britney Spears. One of the bars is owned by an American who comes up with his own slogans…



We then headed to Nana Plaza, where we found ourselves in a go-go mall - three levels of bars with flashing lights and scantily clad employees. We decided to go inside a bar and check it out. We walked through a dark curtain and were immediately met by the hostess who made it very clear that we had to buy at least one drink. There were two stages in the room with seating all around and tables skirting the walls. We sat at the stage. The stages had 15-20 poles and to each was attached a Thai woman. They weren’t dancing like strippers but were merely swaying side to side. They wore matching bikinis and knee-high boots, although some chose to wear their birthday suits. Most importantly, they all had numbered buttons.

How it works: 1. Tell the waitress the number of the girl you like 2. Buy the girl a drink and talk to her 3. Either continue buying drinks, pick another girl or leave the bar 4. If you stayed, negotiate terms with the girl. Sorry to take the romance out of it…but that’s the way it is.



This was going on all around us as we left the bar and it finally clicked. Over my time in Thailand, I had noticed a number of couples made up of an older Caucasian male and much younger Thai woman. And I realized that they weren’t really couples at all – men, either on vacation or a business trip, could buy themselves a girlfriend for their time in Bangkok. It is believed the popular saying “me love you long time” refers to the girls of the red light district. With a “short time” being a few hours or less, a “long time” would be considered overnight – giving the girls a chance to sneak out and make more money. I don’t know if it’s true, but it makes sense…broken English and all.

Oh thank heaven...

…for 7-11. I found that American slogan to be true when I first entered a 7-11 in Thailand. From what I understand, there are over 4,000 stores/franchises in the country with multiple stores on the same road and sometimes directly across the street. It’s like Starbucks in America. Perhaps it was because I was coming off 5 weeks in India, but walking into the convenience store was almost like being at home – except in America they don’t sell tiger balm.

My Thai

Due to my hospital stay in Goa our arrival in Thailand was a bit delayed. With a two-week limit on our adventure, choosing among the many beaches, islands and national parks became quite a challenge. After a quick night in Bangkok, we decided to head south and check out the island of Koh Lanta. We thought a night bus down to Krabi would be a great way to get to the beach and save on a night’s accommodation – we thought wrong. After a sleepless night we arrived at the slightly-out-of-town bus stop where we were easily persuaded to book another ride to Koh Lanta. The island has a laid-back atmosphere, nice beaches and can be explored in a day with a rented scooter.

We spent the better part of a week relaxing at the beach bar, meeting some fellow Californians (it is bizarre how many Californians I meet while traveling) and exploring the island. Basically, we were living the life. Fresh pineapple shakes in the morning, authentic pad Thai in the afternoon and fresh aloe vera massages overlooking the beach for sunset – need I say more?

After a short ferry-ride we arrived in Railay – a rock-climbers mecca famous for it’s limestone cliffs overlooking the water. I spent a few days there with my friend, Suzanne (another Californian), who splits her time between Thailand and Rome. She lives with her boyfriend at the Diamond Cave, where we camped out. Railay was fantastic – we spent our time rock-climbing (in my case "trying" to climb), exploring caves and hiking to the lagoon.

Another night bus back to Bangkok left us on a quite street at 6am where we found a surprisingly cheap double room (shared bathroom in the hallway). When we walked outside later that day we realized why our lodging had such great rates – it was in the middle of Khao San Road, the biggest backpackers street in Bangkok. If you ever go to Bangkok, DO NOT stay here! The road is relatively short, but is home to hundreds of souvenir stands and lined with outdoor restaurants all competing to play the loudest music possible until 2 AM.

While the accommodation was less than ideal, it was cheap and allowed us to do some more exploring and get one last massage before we left. We met up with friends from Koh Lanta and spent some time taking a boat through the canals – a great way to see the suburbs and how people live outside of the big city. We also spent a morning shopping at the weekend market that was so big it has it’s own map (which, of course, we didn’t find until the end) and we barely covered a quarter of it.

We ended it all with a tuk-tuk race – the brainchild of our friend, Brad. The six of us fit into two tuk-tuks (scooter rickshaws) with each driver promised an extra 50baht for arriving first. I was barely in the seat when our driver peeled out and got a head start. We raced down the streets of Bangkok, taunting each other from our open-air seats. What the other driver lacked in speed, he made up in style – popping wheelies as he chased us down the road.

It was a short visit, but we managed to do enough things that I feel like a I need a vacation after my vacation...

Thai Time

Too busy having fun in Thailand to post a blog....leaving tonight for Australia...will blog later!

Goa

I got off to bad start but I really enjoyed Goa. It was like an oasis…I couldn't believe that I was still in India.



The headache started during our 12 hour train ride from Mumbai and once in Goa it just got worse - turned out to be some sort of virus. I suffered through the first three days with high fevers and body aches until Trinea and I decided that I was in no shape to take the overnight train back to the south. After a four days in the hospital the doctor sent me home and the next morning I woke up starving…and not just hungry for food but for getting out of bed and exploring the area. We ended up extending our stay so that I could do just that.

We stayed in Calindum and met some locals and fellow travelers and had a blast. We took a two hour drive in order to take another 45 minute ride in a jeep that led to a 15 minute hike to get to the Doodh Sagar waterfall. It was well worth it - the water was cold and refreshing and we even managed to get Paula in the water. We befriended the hotel owner and local band members who took us to some of the best spots. We went to a night market that was surrounded by palm trees and colored lights where we met some Slovenian artists that we ended up spending time with. We browsed through the stalls and then sat down to enjoy a few performances: a band, a hula-hoop champion, a martial artist and some fire-spinners.

An hour's drive north to Arambol and a 15 minute walk along the beach took us to a freshwater lake with hot springs. It wasn't steaming hot, more like a big bath tub and when we followed the stream up we found the mudbaths. After completely covering ourselves in mud we headed back to the lake to let it dry. The beach was within spitting distance so a short walk and we rinsed off in the sea. It was absolutely stunning and there were barely any people, just the women selling fruit and fresh juices.

Goa has a very relaxed beach atmosphere…everyone rides around on scooters with no helmets and gives a friendly beep and wave when they pass friends. Four of us jumped on two bikes and cruised around to take a look at the Aguada Fort and the church of St. Lawrence who is, I think, the patron saint of the fishing town (sorry but even after 5 years in Italy, I'm still bad with saints). The rest of our time was spent on the beach, watching live music, having bbq's (baby hammerhead shark fillets) and just hanging out until the early morning.

What impressed me the most about Goa was the friendly nature of the people. They are always smiling and are so warm and generous. It's impossible not to make friends. Instead of sitting on the beach and following the advice of a guidebook, we had so much fun learning about life in Goa and seeing all the good spots.

Mumbai

Due to traffic and long distances, the majority of our time in Mumbai was spent in a taxi. And not your run-of-the-mill taxi. Oh no. It was maybe 2/3 the width of a SUV with no AC and really small windows and it was always full of people. We were actually really lucky to have Paula's relatives looking out for us. John, the driver, was lovely and, depending on the day, we had one of the uncles accompanying us. That left the three us, sometimes four, squished and sweaty in the back seat. Like Delhi, driving in Mumbai was crazy. There weren't as many animals, but what captured my attention was all of the activity on the side of the road. Pratically no sidewalk and open fronts left the tiny little shops completely exposed. We even saw a family getting ready for bed and the young boy climbing up to his bunk - from our car window. The strangest thing was seeing all of the slums that occupied any small amount of free space. It was incredible - only the rich neighborhoods were exempt. Unfortunately we didn't get a chance to see the bigger slums, but the ones that we did see were made of metal sheets and tarps and were always full of people. Apparently it is illegal to set up house on the side of the road so people have to be ready to leave at any time. We were stopped in traffic, as usual, and I sat face to face with a woman who was sitting in her house - it was one tarp that formed a tent-like structure with the side of a building. She was just sitting there eating, looked up at me for a few seconds, and then went back to her meal.

The first day we headed to the Elephanta caves - a one hour ferry took us out and we spent the morning admiring the stone carvings and keeping our eyes open for monkeys. The island was full of them. We had to put food and water bottles in our bags or else the monkeys would come after you. I watched as a monkey came up to a couple and kept inching closer and closer until the woman, with her face buried in her husband's neck and whimpering with fear, finally opened her hand and let her berries fall to the ground. Of course, our uncle (Indians refer to elder friends/family as uncles and aunties) had brought in some mini-bananas. Once we pulled those out they came out from everywhere and they meant business. I was too nervous so I just threw my bananas to one little guy and he caught it. We then headed to Chowpatty beach for the sunset and had a beautiful view of the city.

One of the highlights was seeing the dhobi wallahs - the men that wash the city's dirty laundry. It is a huge system and if you send your laundry out this is where it ends up. They wash the clothes by beating them on the stone. From the street above, the men looked like little ants working in a sea of fabric. We stopped at Leopold's (terrorists attacked tourists here last year) for a cold Kingfisher - India's #1 beer.


I really enjoyed spending time with Paula's relatives. Every night, including the first night when we arrived at 11pm, we had a home-cooked meal and lots of eager faces watching as we ate. It was definitely the best food that I had in India but it was also an awkward experience. We sat at the table eating and the family sat on the floor in front of us just watching - we had an audience of perhaps fifteen people (all three brothers live in the same building) in a 25 square meter room. The three families used to live in the concrete-house slums and belonged to the same housing society. I'm not sure if it was the government, but a project was started to build new apartments with modern facilities. After agreeing to the project, each family was displaced for seven years and either stayed with family or were given funds to find temporary housing. When it was completed, each family was given an apartment with two 25 sq. mt. rooms - one for living and sleeping and the other a kitchen/bathroom. Families of five all sleeping in one room. Everything in the house was multi-purpose: couches turned into beds, table expanded or were used as chairs and the bathroom, which was barely big enough to turn around in, included a toilet, shower, and sink. I can't even begin to imagine what my life would be like, what I would be like, if I were raised in similar conditions. The smell from my brothers alone would be unbearable.

It was really interesting and I felt extremely honored to have had a glimpse into their lives. And it was just as exciting for them. I was the first foreigner that some of the teenagers had ever met and they never stopped asking questions. The aunties were amazed that I am 27 years old, unmarried, and traveling the world. I was amazed at their living conditions, the fact that they would be arranging their daughters marriages, and by their simple and open way of life. I guess we all had a bit of culture shock...